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On the 13th October 2015 I will be 35 years old. For 35 years I’ve never cared about getting old, I looked forward to it in fact, but this year it comes with the need to make actual decisions. Instead of putting it off another year I really do have to decide (with Simon) if we are having children. If so, how? Do we just leave it to fate and wait and see? Do we see if we need help? If we need help do we get IVF or use a surrogate? Or do we adopt? If we adopt how old would we want the child to be?

Can we afford it? I think we can even in our current state. Am I able to look after my own? Disabled people have children naturally, they have IVF and they adopt – this is not the issue.

Do we have the room? If Simon gives up his man-cave for an adopted child, then yes. If we have a baby then they’ll be in our bedroom for a year and we’ll move to a bungalow or bigger apartment in the meantime.

Do IĀ want children? Well, if I have a baby then I won’t have it any other way than IVF. Even then I want to have a near 100% guarantee that the poor sod won’t inherit my autoimmune disease. I am leaning more towards adoption, and adopting up to the age of five.

I hate the ticking of this clock, but I also do not want to be dead before my kids are 18.